For the past few weeks, the Belacan family has been tolerating Ginger (a female cat) and her 2 month old Kitty meowing, sleeping and shitting in our enclosed backyard. But something happened last Saturday that changed the whole arrangement. Ginger did something very, very unforgivable.
She stole from the dining table a piece of Mrs B's fried luncheon meat!
I would have laughed the whole thing off except that Ginger's actions indirectly caused great annoyance to me.
Let me explain; as I was happily taking a lukewarm shower in the hot hot hot Saturday evening, humming away one of my favourite shower tunes... suddenly, Mrs B barged into the bathroom, forcefully opened the shower screen and screamed "Stupid catttt!". Naturally, I thought she wanted to rape me in the shower (Mrs B - yeah, dream on!) but noooooo.
My lovely wifey proceeded to rant about her catching the stupid cat stealing a piece of her fried luncheon meat, about all the hardwork frying and the cat stole it away, and telling me to remember to close the stupid backdoor the next time. *plang* she closed the shower screen *gerek gerek klong!* she closed the bathroom's sliding wooden door.
All in, it was about 15 seconds. I stood there under the shower, naked with soap bubbles all over my sexy body and all my wife did was scream "Stupid cat"? She could have ended everything by saying "oh, by the way, nice butt *wink wink*.." or something naughty like that but nooooo, that luncheon meat was more important to Mrs B.
So, can you see why I am so pissed off with Ginger and Kitty? They have relegated my sexy butt to below "luncheon meat"! Arrrghhhh! How degrading!
Later that night, as I finished watching Puteri Gunung Ledang and switching off everything, I heard Ginger and Kitty meowing inside my kitchen. Quietly like a cat, I tiptoed to the kitchen. In the dark I spied Ginger in the hallway and Kitty at the sink area. I quickly flicked on the kitchen lights and rushed in screaming "Muahahahahahar!". Ginger easily ran out the back door but poor Kitty was cornered near the kitchen sink. I blocked her exit, and screamed "Muahahahahar!" as evilish as I can. Kitty's tail was all fluffed up and she tried jumping miserably to climb over the kitchen cabinet. I chased Kitty from one corner to the other corner for about 1 minute before I took pity on her, and gave her some space to scoot away. Man! Was I having a good boyish fun!
That should teach them a lesson for messing with my butt's status! Slept like a baby that night ;)
Belacan asks... "Does this make me a pussy chaser? Hmmm..."